How old are you?

I have been thinking a lot about age lately. The lovely women I work with in my life coaching practice sometimes seem older than they are because of the pressure and burdens they place upon themselves. The guilt they carry is as deep and wide as the number of "should's" on their lists of things to do. I know that their exhaustion is much more than a physically demanding schedule.

On the other end of the spectrum I have beautiful, wise-beyond their years, nieces who seem much older than their tender ages. They are thoughtful and funny and very wise. They can be reflective and have insights that are so unexpected from someone so young. I marvel at them.I myself feel much younger than forty and know I look at least 30 on my good days. I bought my first real expensive pair of Lucky jeans this weekend and I know I felt maybe 20 if not a "totally psyched" 16 year old. As I started at my butt, in the 3 way mirror I was thinking -- how old am I really? Is it physical or just mental or a combination of both?

If age is in part a mental state what keeps you young? I think in part it is extreme self care. Not just vigilance but healthy eating, exercise, love, companionship, and mental exercise. Clearing out the clutter and doing a brain dump of all the crap we so easily carrying around and accumulate over the years. It is noise and confusion and worry. Yoga, meditation, and exercise are activities that lend themselves to moving mental clutter. Also talking to supportive and loving friends, spouses, and colleagues can help. Therapy and life coaching can also help. Sometimes we forget we also have ourselves to rely on. I frequently have conversations with myself to try to sort things out.

How do you measure your age? I am glad not to be 20 again in terms of experience and a much improved self image. I wish however, sometimes I could go backwards in time with the same knowledge and experience I have as a 40 year old. But, that would be cheating wouldn't it? The only yearning would be to have some of that perceived sense of freedom. Somehow the world was yet undiscovered. I suppose the only limitations are the ones inside my own 40 year old head but don't tell my 20+ body it can't surf just yet.